Be nice to all Norwegians you meet on the Internet -
they probably are your cousins!
"If you have ancestors from the Singsaas Norway area, you probably are descended from Per Persen Vinsnes (1638-1701) or Elev Anderssen Singsås (1681-1744) or both! Doubt it? Give me a chance to prove it!"
Jim Winsness - December 6, 2005
(Elev Anderssen Singsås was also the nephew of the wife of Per Persen Vinsnes)
I guess it can't be a Norwegian site if there isn't some humor. I've never laughed so hard and so often as the time I was at Annbjorg and Jakob Winsnes house, Storstuu, in Norway. So I'll add some that people send me.
Anderson Independent Mail Newspaper, Dec. 7, 2005:
Fly Lutheran Airlines!
Let's fly away, all you Norskies!
YA, SHURE, YA BETCHA! DIS IS DA LATEST AIR SERVICE TO SPROUT UP IN
MINNESNOWTA. ALSO SERVING VISCONSIN, NORT UND SOUT DAKOTA, UND MOONTANA. TRY
IT, YOU VILL LIKE IT!
If you are traveling soon, tink about Lutheran Air, da no-frills airline. Ve
are all in da same boat on Lutheran Air, vhere flying is an uplifting
experience. Dere is no first class on dis Lutheran Air flight. Meals are
potluck. Rows 1-6, bring rolls; 7-15, bring a salad; 16-21, a main dish
absolutely NO lutefisk), und 22-30, a dessert.
Basses und tenors vill sit in da rear of da aircraft. Everyone is
responsible for his or her own baggage. All fares are by freevill offering
und da plane vill not land until da budget is met. Pay attention to your
flight attendant, who vill acquaint you vith da safety system aboard dis
Lutheran Air 599.
Okay den, listen up: I'm only gonna say dis vonce. In da event of a sudden
loss of cabin pressure, I am frankly going to be real surprised and so vill
Captain Olson because ve fly right around 2000 feet, so loss of cabin
pressure would probably indicate da Second Coming or something of dat
nature, und I vouldn't bother vith dose little masks on da rubber tubes.
You're gonna haf bigger tings to vorry about dan dat. Yust stuff dose back
up in der little hidey holes. Probably da masks fell out because of
turbulence vhich, to be honest vith you, ve're going to haf quite a bit of
at 2000 feet .. sort of like driving across a plowed field, but after a
vhile you get used to it.
In da event of a water landing, I'd say forget it. Start saying da Lord's
Prayer und yust hope you get to da part about forgiff us our sins as we
forgiff dose who sin against us, vhich some pipples say "trespass against
us," vhich isn't right, but vhat can you do?
Da use of cell phones on da plane is strictly forbidden, not because dey may
interfere vith da plane's navigational system, vhich is seat of da pants all
da vay. No, it's because cell phones are a pain in da wazoo, und if God
meant you to use a cell phone, He vould haf put your mouth on da side of
Ve're going to start lunch right about noon und it's buffet style vith da
coffee pot up front. Den ve'll haf da hymn sing; hymnals in da seat pocket
in front of you. Don't take yours vit you vhen you go or I am gonna be real
upset und I am not yoking!
Right now I vill say Grace. "Come, Lord Jesus, be our guest und let dese
gifts to us be blest. Father, Son, und Holy Ghost, may ve land in Dulut or
pretty close. Amen."
March 16, 2005: BISMARCK, N.D. - Saje Beard's half-hour commute to class is the envy of her four classmates at a one-room schoolhouse just south of here. Most mornings, the third-grader makes the trek on Ruth the mule.
"She's called many things, but Ruth is what we call her in public," Saje said of the 4-year-old gray mule. "Actually, that's my dad's joke. She's really nice and gentle. And she sure is smart."
Saje, 9, is an old hand at maneuvering mules. She's been doing it since she was in first grade.
"I feel more safe with her riding a mule than having her ride in a car or on a bus," said her father, Marty Beard.
At the Manning School, about 15 miles south of the North Dakota capital, Saje "parks" Ruth by tying her with a bowline to a tree near swing sets and monkey bars. Ruth then gets some leather hobbles attached to her front legs, a routine Saje began after her other mule, Shirley, got loose and ran home from school last year.
Saje's classmates, who are in kindergarten through fourth grade, help take off Ruth's saddle and tack. It's stored in the school's cloakroom, next to basketballs and other playground equipment.
The five children then run to the school's flagpole to recite the Pledge of Allegiance and sing the national anthem. The mule, named Ruth, prances and kicks up dirt as the children sing.
"It's cool," Lucas Irving, 10, said of his classmate and her mode of transportation. "She's cool."
Saje would ride Ruth every morning, but her dad won't let her if the temperature is below zero - "even if she insists."
Saje proved just how much she's willing to endure on a recent trek to school in below-freezing temperatures and strong winds.
"My cheeks are burning," she said, "but that's OK."
Saje gets up at sunup to prepare for school. She brushes Ruth and feeds her grain, then hoists an old saddle that weighs nearly as much as she does over the chubby mule.
"Come on Ruthie, come on mule," she says as she leads her mount to the front yard.
Saje raises her foot above her head to reach a stirrup, pulls herself up and swings the other leg over. She pulls down the coonskin hat her father made and gives Ruth a gentle nudge in the ribs.
"Let's go girl," she says.
Saje has corn and sweet peas stuffed in saddlebags for Ruth's lunch, and for treats during the school's three recesses. Her homework and a tuna fish sandwich are in her backpack, tied to the mule.
Saje and Ruth follow a gravel road and pass dozens of horses from other farms during the two-mile trip. Ruth is fitted with special carbide-studded shoes to make the already sure-footed animal even more so, especially on ice.
Mules are known for protecting themselves and their riders. Marty Beard said the mule would likely attack anyone who hassled Saje along the route.
"She would probably implant those special shoes on their forehead," he said.
The trip home always is a little faster: Ruth knows she'll have some grain waiting, so she picks up the pace without prodding, Saje said.
Kris Beard, Saje's mother, said even some of their rural neighbors find her daughter's mule commute unusual.
"It's not strange for us, but for other people it is quite different," she said. "We're very fortunate to live here."